You throw out all the cheap canned food. You buy him nutrient dense meat. The best you afford. You buy him a new lead and matching collar. You take him for a walk-just up and down the driveway at first. He is so excited to go for a walk. His tail wags and wags. After a week, or so you go a bit further. Soon you and he are walking to the park. After a while, you buy a ball and begin to throw it to him. The dog loves it.
The reason you decided to start looking after this dog better, was not so you would love him more- It was because you loved him so much.
Now, the other thing to note here is that you weren’t trying to change your dog. You didn’t say to him, “If only you were a dog with a fast metabolism, then this would be easy.’ “If only I had a meal plan this would easy” “If only you could take yourself for a walk”.
“It’s not fair, my neighbour’s dog can eat whatever it likes-why can’t mine”
And the other thing is that…you didn’t wish your dog was a whippet!
Humans are very much like dogs. We come in all shapes and sizes and like all dogs, we are amazing creatures. Our bodies are incredible beings.
Unfortunately, the beauty industry, fashion industry, dieting and fitness industry has declared that the perfect human should look like a whippet.
When you think about it, it’s so stupid. We don't want all our dogs to be whippets.
We love the fact that dogs come in all shapes and sizes-from Chihuahua to Great Danes, from Poodles to Labradors. They are all beautiful. They are different.
Humans are the same. We as a society need to stop judging other bodies. We all do it and it’s encouraged. It's been going on for a very long time. Think of beauty pageants, fashion magazines. Gawd think even further back to the days of corsets!
Unfortunately, as we’ve progressed, the body judging and shaming has become worse and worse. It’s prevalent everywhere. I even did it today as I clicked on a picture of one of the Kardashians- God knows why. This is the lure of a clickbait headline. Anyway, my immediate thought was OMG she looks like BRATZ Doll. There were thousands of comments on her appearance. Some were positive. The majority were negative. Now, I know what you’re thinking, “Well if she puts her photo up there, what does she expect?” But do you know what? She’s a human and there is no need for us to be judging. If we all stopped judging and commenting then this type of objectification of women’s bodies would stop.
Do we just people who are overweight or obese? Absolutely our society does and when it's done out loud it's called fat-shaming. It is unhelpful to everyone concerned. It has to stop.
Some people do it because are just plain mean.
Other people do it because they think it will help the person become motivated. But it doesn’t.
It does the opposite.
People feel embarrassed, mortified and ashamed. They feel small.
So if you’re a mean person, then congratulations! Goal achieved.
If shaming another person makes you feel better, then you’ve some work to do on your own self-worth.
I remember walking along to the beach one day. I was about 25. A car of hoons yelled out the window “Fat arse!!!” I was mortified. I had just moved out of home so I ran back and sobbed to my housemates. They were so lovely. They started calling each other “fat arse” and in fact, that became the term of endearment for all of us. “Good morning Fat Arse”. “Night, Night Fat Arse”. How was your day Fat Arse?”
What they did was take the sting, the humiliation out of those words for me. They made it funny. They heard me, validated me and then showed that I mattered.
The hoons were misogynistic losers. Does it matter that my bottom is a bit bigger than the standard behind? Of course not. Remember we’re not all whippets!
They aimed to humiliate me. Well done boys it worked- but not for long!
We don’t know someone’s journey. We don't know why their body is storing excess fat and frankly, it's none of our business. I can tell you now nobody wants to be storing excess fat.
What I want you to do is to start noticing your tendency to comment or judge other people’s bodies. It’s the first step. We think we don’t do it but we all do and the only way to stop it is to notice, catch yourself out and then practice stopping.
You do not need to become a whippet to find joy.
Love and Live Well,